Sealer04's Xanga

Sarah's New Website!

Tue, 21 Apr 2009 03:43:25 GMT

Check out Sarah's new art website!

http://www.sarahmaxwellenglish.com

Since most of my content isn't original

Fri, 20 Mar 2009 05:05:33 GMT

Here is my new favorite twitter to follow: Christopher Walken (@cwalken):
"Secretary of Ironic Scarves." I don't know if Obama read my letter but I hope so. Ashton Kutcher deserves this. So does California.
about 9 hours ago from web
A friend from out west mailed me a "Snuggie." A joke apparently. I don't get it. I look like a derelict Gumby in the thing. Funny, I guess.
about 14 hours ago from web
There's a kid on a Pogo stick in front of my house. It's nearly midnight so let's assume he's been drinking. This should end well for him.
10:41 PM Mar 18th from web
The Pope is in Africa "reaffirming the ban on condom use." His old stuff was funnier. I don't get this new material. Too edgy for my taste.
4:10 PM Mar 18th from web
Someone corrected my last post; said it's "frightened by" not "frightened of." Know what else I'm frightened of? Crazy people.
9:29 AM Mar 18th from web
I claim to be frightened of horses but do so only to get out of attending parades. It's peculiar but has served me well. The horses get it.
1:49 PM Mar 17th from web
I made a little pimp outfit and put it in the yard. The bluejay hasn't come back since. Some weird shit going on with the squirrels though.
4:15 PM Mar 16th from web
A soldier on leave told me how much he admired me. Without really knowing me at all. We're alike that way. I hope to see him again too.
12:20 PM Mar 16th from web
I'll probably mention Elimae once a month or so. I don't know these folks but they do fiction and poetry right: http://elimae.com/new.html
9:46 AM Mar 16th from web
I spent $40.00 on a bag of food for a dog that eats extension cords. That's still probably cheaper than a bag of extension cords I suppose.
8:20 AM Mar 16th from web
A dog walked by wearing a frilly sweater. The neighbor kid laughed and said, "That's gay!" He meant the cardigan, I think. Not the dog.
9:07 AM Mar 15th from web
I don't remember saying that the geese had eaten all of the kittens in Central Park. No matter. She's upset and the geese are very confused.
2:12 PM Mar 14th from web
She said, "What if you really are you?" and that blew my mind. Okay, it didn't blow my mind. It feels like a good answer though.
12:17 PM Mar 14th from web
There are many people here now. More than before. It seems undignified to talk about that though so I won't. Welcome, I think.
10:25 PM Mar 13th from web
Our driver told the story of his childhood spirit animal - which was apparently a civet cat or seasoned marmot. I'm hungry for a pickle now.
1:06 PM Mar 13th from web
Thank you, new follower, for the offer to let me keep my fingers in the event of a kidnapping. I hadn't given it much thought before today.

Nazi Dinosaurs

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 23:09:30 GMT

This is just too fun. Thanks to Pajiba for letting me know.

Food

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 14:27:06 GMT

I like food. It's delicious, except when its terrible. Today I made oatmeal with milk, chocolate protein powder, and peanut butter. That' right, crunchy peanut butter. It's awesome and super hardy.

Also on a food related note, here is a great website. I want to taste everything it has to offer.

Best Quote from Small Group

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 03:52:39 GMT

Rhett - Zach, like Zach Morris timeout? Can you STOP TIME?
Zach - (angry and afraid) - What happens between me & the 4th dimension is my business!

80's Sci Fi Movie Marathon!!!!

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 20:10:30 GMT

This Saturday from noon to 8pm we'll be watching classic 80's Sci Fi movies, ad afterwrads rocking out to Rockband. Let me know if you want directions to Josh's house.

And now, Rhett telling you about the movies:

New Level of Mash-up

Mon, 26 Jan 2009 20:44:08 GMT

Jaydiohead really impressed me, and I love the mix of Roxanne and Superfreak.

But I was exposed to a whole new level thanks to Josh.

Girl Talk

Thank you

Sun, 25 Jan 2009 06:57:46 GMT

Brandon and Josh

Thank you

for Jaydiohead

I never

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 19:06:36 GMT

I never thought I would enjoy running
I never felt right going to bed before midnight
I never was behind on the latest technology
I never got confused when I heard teens talk
I never thought I would create a budget
but I got old.

Not as old as Brandon though, he's 30 already.

A True Story

Thu, 01 Jan 2009 22:00:44 GMT

(disclaimer - this involves lots of poop talk)

I was on vacation recently to Santa Fe with the in-laws, having a great time and eating like a king. For Breakfast one day, we decided to eat at a diner referred to us by non other than the Food Network's show Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. Great show, great food. We were not disappointed.

As the meal finished up, I felt a familiar call form my bowels. I stood in line for the small, closet sized restroom with one toilet. When my turn came up, I squeezed into the room and sat down to do my business. Out of my insides came forth the largest movement I have experienced in my near 30 years. 4 thick cords like nautical rope strung together in the bowl and even dared to breach the water surface. Pride shown from my face and lit up the closet.

I decided to flush now before my pride overwhelmed me and I invited in others to see my glorious deposit. A slight bit of water came down the bowl and did little but raise the normal level. I waited a moment and flushed again, making sure I held the handle down to let the flush fully engage. Nothing but a near overflow. My pride now was competing with disbelief. Had I done the unthinkable? The enigmatic Beaver Dam - the paperless clog?

2 more flushes and a plunger confirmed my legendary status.